In November 2016, a few days after arriving at Benefis Peace Hospice in Great Falls, Montana, my wonderful husband, Doug, became confused and agitated. He’d been living with penile cancer for thirteen months and was near the end of a very painful journey, yet until that evening he had maintained his usual jovial demeanor. I quickly pressed the call button and then reassured him until the nurse arrived, thankful to be among competent and loving caregivers at such a scary moment.
Just before moving into in-patient hospice care Doug surprised me one morning with a love letter he'd written for me. A couple of days later he read the letter aloud so I could record this video. I am so glad we did that! Hearing my beloved's voice and seeing the love in his eyes reminds me of how truly adored I felt, every single day of our life together.
"You two really love each other!" ~ says someone nearly every day, whether Doug and I are shopping at an outlet mall, walking hand-in-hand to our car, smooching in the corridor at work, or visiting with his hospice nurse. And it's true; we really, really love each other. And now he's really, really dying.
How can those last two sentences be in the same paragraph, in the same life, in my life?